On throwing a Holly fit

The Holly fit comes to you when that unnameable fear becomes apparent, it becomes all too real. It could be as devastating as hearing about the death of a loved one. It could also be after realizing that your possessive, controlling boyfriend has been fooling around all along, and your obedience, devotion, and loyalty to him have been put to waste. It could be deaths on a massive scale. It could be small, inner deaths. Whatever it is, its arrival should be sudden. Its suddenness should feel like a blow. It should have the power to rock you to your very core.he Holly fit comes to you when that unnameable fear becomes apparent, it becomes all too real. It could be as devastating as hearing about the death of a loved one. It could also be after realizing that your possessive, controlling boyfriend has been fooling around all along. It could be deaths on a massive scale. It could be small, inner deaths. Whatever it is, its arrival should be sudden. Its suddenness should feel like a blow. It should have the power to rock you to your very core.

When Great Trees Fall

As implied in the previous blog entry, I am currently battling severe depression. My father passed away on the 20th of August, plunging me deeper into an already fragile mental state (no thanks to the pandemic), and every day since the 20th has been about forcing myself to want to live. I remember when I…

‘Whatever happened to your Papa?’

It has been 43 days since my Papa left us. He died at the age of 72. His death has plunged me deeper into my depression. His death has made my living feel like an obligation: I continue to live because I have to, not because I want to.

When Covidiots rule the world

They trust their American-ness more than Science. It is un-American to wear a mask. It is un-American to not be partying with friends at the beach during spring break. It is un-American to just stay at home.

Everyone’s in their own personal coma

So I am back to traditional blogging. Again. One year after I promised myself that I will go back to traditional blogging (after years of hiatus). One year after drunk-buying my own .org domain (which at that time I intended to use exclusively for ranting) – but never got to use it eventually. I’ve been…

BLM: A new buzzword among white saviours

 #BlackLivesMatteris now the new buzzword in the aid sector. A couple of months ago – before the murder of George Floyd sparked a BLM uprising – a BIPOC guy (a UK-based Filipino – I don’t personally know him, but I think he’s such a rockstar) shared his talk about decolonising project management in the aid…